Because we must

Yeah, I will write this one in English, deal with it.

So, this is basically gonna be about different ways of saying “hello” and “goodbye” to people. As a Swedish person living amongst Chinese and British people (mostly) I’ve noticed that this can be a bit tricky. My theory is that if I’ve met a person more than three times, I consider him/her to be a friend. I know, I might be a little bit overly keen on calling people friends, but that’s how I work.  That is NOT how 95 % of the people here work.

Picture this; you see a person you know coming towards you. You might say “Hey!” and wave (and sometimes you might do this to strangers as well, when your contacts are fucked up). No big deal. “Hey!”, and you may even add “How are you?” if you’re feeling very social. Now, as for me.. I will hug you. I’ve met you several times. I feel it is my duty to hug you! You probably don’t get enough hugs anyway. I do this without even thinking about it.

This habit of mine has created many very awkward situations.  As I go in for the hug, the person opposite goes in for the handshake, and we end up doing an awkward handshake/hug/pat on the back. Then we laugh uncomfortably, and go our separate ways.

I have no idea how to greet these people. Nor how to say goodbye. Now I get an anxiety attack whenever I see someone I “know” coming towards me. Am I supposed to wave? Nod? Run away? When is it OK to hug a Chinese/British person? Does someone have to die? Condolence hugs? Or do I have to enter a relationship in order for me to hug them?

If anyone knows, please let me know. I’m completely at a loss here, and I’m afraid that the whole Chinese/British community thinks I’m a crazy whore.